Befriend Your Fears

  Les Brown once said "When you no longer fear dying, what else can life threaten you with?" Though fear of dying is #2 in the global list of fears (fear of speaking in public is #1), it is a profound fear. Yet, what does it mean to fear? Why do we fear something? Fear is always an internal process based upon experiences, assumptions and interpretations. It tells us we should be afraid that something in the (near) future can harm us in our well-being - whether that harm is physical, emotional or psychological. We fear fear itself, because that what we fear is unknown to us. Our brain calculates the possibilities of getting hurt by doing or experiencing this action, and with possible past experiences, it tells us to be careful and cautious in approaching that what we fear. The keyword, however, is not 'fear' or 'hurt'. It is 'approach'. Fear can disable us in our action to move forward, as long as we remain fearful to the scenarios that are playing within our minds. The longer we stay in that fear, the harder it becomes to move forward. Fear is not your enemy though. It has no added value to swipe your fear under the rational rug or to ignore it - it will only become louder, until it's deafening and ignoring is no longer possible. Instead, listen to your fear. Listen to what it has to say. Start an internal dialogue even. Fear is a part of you, but it is not you. Fear is an action signal, stating that whatever you are approaching right now, you might not be prepared enough for to cope or deal with it successfully. if fear tells you that you need better preparation, it might be good advice to follow up on. If fear still remains to shout at loud volume, talk to it. By interacting with your fear and letting it know that the potential danger is not as big as it seems, fear usually will subside, or at least tone down on its warning messages. Like a human being, we can converse with our fears. Ignoring someone that shouts next to your ears doesn't help, especially if they want you to listen to them. But acknowledging the other, and connecting to it, results in the recognition of the other, and basically, that's all it needs. You choose, because you are not your fear. You are still the captain of your ship, and you decide how to go thru this storm. Based upon past experiences, and with the realization that you're still here, there is enough trust and confidence to underline you are a great captain. Go beyond your fear, you owe it to yourself. There's no limit to your potential. You are awesome! To your success, Robert