This morning I had a conversation with someone who’s struggling with her work-life balance. So many things on her plate, “I can’t digest even half of it all”, she said. As a business owner with personell, mother of two, partner as well as many more titles, it’s not hard to imagine her work-life balance is currently in shambles. And to top it off, she’s a natural multitasker, has millions of ideas to expand her business, personal life and relationships with her partner, friends and family – and is everything but meticulous and organized to streamline and strategize all of her wishes, goals and to do-lists.

During a walk with my dog, I decided to give her a call and check up on well-being. This was the moment where she informed me about all of the above whilst saying casually, she also was suffering from flu-symptoms. 

Getting Clarity

To make a long story short; we spent about half an hour in which I strategically asked some questions to get more clarity on where things were derailing the most, so we could work toward getting things back on track – and find peace of mind. This peace of mind by the way, is not some kumbaya-type of meditative state where everything is beautiful, nothing has to be done and one can live in total bliss simply by acknowledging they ‘just be’; peace of mind means one has a better grip on things that cause stress, knows how to reduce that and keeps on moving forward by taking consecutive actions towards their desired goals. 

Order From Chaos

Her focal point for stress, and therefore the main issue to be resolved, was to create order out of chaos. We often have so many things on our to-do list, we end up creating more to-do lists for our to-do lists whilst barely anything is getting done properly, efficiently and effectively. The solutions one can find in decluttering their mind can often be found in a simple time-management tool. 

I know, there are many. And each one is more sophisticated than the other one or paradoxically, stripped down to its bare essentials. But the purpose of a time-management tool is to – you guessed it – manage your time better. I myself use the one that's easy, simple and effective. It usually takes no more than a couple of minutes and at the end, you have a clear overview of what needs to be done first.

The key in this, once again is action. And that brings me to the second point of this all. 

Use Your Tools

We often times know what to do, but we don’t do what we know. This philosophy can be used for all of our life’s facets. Whether it’s for our business or career, our health and vitality, our relationships; even our finances. 

Any plan requires actions. Without it, it’s merely a desire or a dream. And though desires are the seedlings of reality and dreams are the starting point of any achievement, effort only fully releases its reward after a person refuses to quit. Having a tool but never using it is just as worthwhile as chanting “there are no weeds, there are no weeds” whilst standing in your garden that’s overgrowing due to a lack of action. 

Still stuck? Seeks Support

For the educated, analytical and self-enlightened mind it’s easy to argue where the root of inactivity comes from – after all, one might argue that to know the cause is to be able to resolve the issue in its entirety – I would say you’re right… but does it work for you to be right? Or would you rather want to be happy and get the sh*t done?

I love getting to the bottom of things. After all, it’s my work as a coach to know why people do what they do. But most of us aren’t coaches. And so, to sit and ponder and make this question into a quest is far from being effective. No one in their right mind would give up their valuable time to ask questions that only enable and increase procrastination. 

Just as a side-note: the #1 reason why we procrastinate by philosophizing is fear and uncertainty. We all have more “What-if’s than we’d like to admit, but the fact of the matter is that fear was never supposed to be our advisor. At best, it’s our informer, telling us what most likely will happen if we don’t take action now. Leave the soul-searching causes of fears, limiting beliefs and non-constructive habits for your coach. 

Conclusion

So, what can you take home after reading this?

Perhaps you recognized a few things of your own life when reading this. And perhaps you even recognized some of the insights and nuggets I touched on here and there. It’s very likely not much is new for you. But the big question is: what are you doing about the things that need some attention to work better?

You might not know how to improve your work-life balance, or perhaps you do. But what have you done lately to turn that knowledge into action and behavior? I know sometimes life can be in the way of our ideals. But when things don’t work out in the way we’d like them to be, we’re basically stuck with one of two options. Either we quit what we’re doing or we change and adapt what we’re doing to increase the chance of getting better results. But in no way is not doing anything or keep on doing what we’ve always done the best choice. And I know no one wants to choose for anything less than the best choice. 

3ft From Gold

I started re-reading “Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill recently. Early in the book, Hill’s talking about a man, Mr. Darby, who once had the idea to look for gold in the U.S. He borrowed capital from friends and family to invest in machines to dig up the gold. And sure enough, at one point he did find some. Not enough to pay off the debts he owed, but enough to realize there was probably more to find. He dug and dug, but couldn’t find anymore and eventually gave up and sold his machines to someone to pay off part of the money he owed. Something that would take him a much longer time he’d hoped for, by the way. The guy who bought those machines wasn’t sure if there any gold left in the place Mr. Darby had been digging. So, like any smart person would do, he hired a specialist to figure out if it was worth the time, effort and money to go back into the mine and look for gold. After some calculation and consideration, the specialist said: Yes. If you dig three feet from the place where Mr. Darby was digging, you’ll find a large vein of gold. The man took the specialist’s’ advice, dug and found so much, he trumped the findings of Mr. Darby by a landslide. 

The moral of this story? We’re often on the right path, doing things that pay off in the short term. But not always is it smart to keep doing what we’ve always done, let alone to give up and walk away. Sometimes, all that’s needed is someone from the outside, a specialist of sorts, that can help you to strike the proverbial gold you’re looking for. Sometimes, you’re only a few feet away from something that’ll change your life…

If you liked this post, consider having a free coaching call with me to clarify your vision and direction, learn and implement the strategies and skills needed to move toward your goals and improve your psychology for optimal success in your career and personal life - despite your cluttered agenda, your countless to-do lists or your overactive awesome brain.

To your success, 

Robert